Category Archives: people
That’s Unfair. That’s Life.
Have you ever been unfairly judged or unjustly accused? About something that you had nothing to do with?
I’m sure you have. Or else you are not human. Or you have relationships that are not with humans. 🙂 It happens some time or the other to every one of us. And at times, you are likely doing the judging.
We’ve all seen some extreme cases of this occurence. Someone is sent to prison and years later is found to be innocent. Tragic really because that person’s precious years and life have vanished. And then you see someone like Mandela (no, not Morgan Freeman!) and what he accomplished while in prison and it’s like, wow!
But most people don’t deal with such extremes or excesses.
Frequently these “unfair things” are insignificant and don’t occupy a lot of space in your brain. But then something might have happened to you ages ago. It’s not even that consequential. But you still remember it clear as day today. Why?
Picture this.
There’s a young child in kindergarten. Each evening when this 5 year old goes home, she and her other 5 year old friends meet with a tutor, someone who ensures that their homework is getting done.
Something strange is afoot though. Every once in a while, very mysteriously, this girl’s school books disappear right on time…that is, when it’s time to do her homework. The kid claims that she doesn’t have a clue where her books are. But the tutor is convinced that she is hiding them herself because she doesn’t want to have anything to do with homework that day. So she berates, reprimands, shouts at the kid. To no avail. The child cries but the teacher is convinced that it’s all an act and those are simply crocodile tears. The child says she has no idea where her books are. But the teacher doesn’t believe her. Especially when the books appear just as mysteriously when it’s time for school the next day.
Then one day.
Lo and behold, the child “finds” one of her hidden books. She is thrilled. She comes running to the teacher, smiling and can’t wait to let her know about this wonderful find! She shows the book to her and tells her where she found it.
What does the teacher say?
Of course, you found it. You are the one who hid it there!
And it gets worse. Just for finding the book and bringing it to her, she is sent off to stand in the corner facing the wall as punishment. With her friends as witnesses. The ultimate humiliation.
Fast forward to many years later, the kids in question are all in their late teens, they’ve reunited with the tutor and are sitting around chatting about the good old days. Somehow, the topic of the hidden books in kindergarten comes up – remember when…? One of the friends pipes up and says, you know, I’m the one who hid your books. Everyone is having a good laugh. Meanwhile, I’m thinking –
WHAT?
To this day, that hurts. Not so much that a friend hid my books – she probably had a good reason to do so. Maybe I did something to anger or annoy her, and she wanted to retaliate. Or she was having a string of bad days. It could have been anything. Kids will be kids.
What hurts is that the tutor did not believe me. She had made up her mind and nothing I said or did convinced her.
It’s funny what you remember when you grow up, isn’t it?
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Are you a Facebook hater?
Are you a facebook hater? Do you look down your nose at fb users?
Here are quotes from a few (of many, many,many!) people who enjoy skewering facebook. Maybe you are like one or more of them?
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“I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.” ― Jason Hendeles
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“Friendship is something to be achieved over years of deep and intimate connection, not by clicking on a small picture and requesting it.” ― Ivo Quartiroli, Facebook Logout – Experiences and Reasons to Leave It
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“Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?” ― Bill Maher
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“Of course you’re not egotistical. I checked, and you look very humble in all 900 of the selfies you posted on facebook.” ― Sienna McQuillen
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“It amazes me that we are all on Twitter and Facebook. By “we” I mean adults. We’re adults, right? But emotionally we’re a culture of seven-year-olds. Have you ever had that moment when are you updating your status and you realize that every status update is just a variation on a single request: “Would someone please acknowledge me?” ― Marc Maron, Attempting Normal
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“Facebook gives people an illusory sense of being LIKED.” ― Mokokoma Mokhonoana
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I, on the other hand, am an active fb user and aficionado. Perhaps not as active as I used to be, but still there checking fb a couple of times every day (I lie, it’s more).
Mark Zuckerberg does not need my help nor any more users…but I thought I would lay out why I’m a fan.
Ah, what the heck. Let me give Mark Z some more friends even though he doesn’t really need my help with any of this.
It all boils down to this: I feel amazingly connected. Correction. I am connected.
To who, you say?
- To my old school friends (and teachers!) who I had not heard from or about for years and years (I won’t date myself and say for how long)
- To long lost friends and colleagues that I should not have lost touch with…but life took over
- To my cousins and other family friends who are spread out around the country and world…how else would I hear about all the wonderful stories of Satya’s little ones who I have yet to meet?!
- To my current pals who I still see every week
- To my old pals who have moved away from town
- To my family members including my mom who lives 10,000 miles away
- To my kids (but I see only what they choose to show me)
And what’s it all worth to me?
As MasterCard says so well, in these days where time and life seem to be zipping along at an ever increasing pace, those connections (and especially the ease of them) are simply priceless.
“My generation was secretive, brooding, ambitious, show-offy, and this generation is congenial. Totally. I imagine them walking around with GPS chips that notify them when a friend is in the vicinity, and their GPSes guide them to each other in clipped electronic lady voices and they sit down side by side in a coffee shop and text-message each other while checking their e-mail and hopping and skipping around Facebook to see who has posted pictures of their weekend.” ― Garrison Keillor
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The Yin and Yang of Life Anywhere 